Poem, I wrote awhile ago...

The Good and Myself


Thinking of thinking was thinking of you Thinking that thinking would make you think of me too Living with living I just couldn't live for you Living with life hoping you'd understand and yet, You never came through Loving with loving and longing for love was only a myth Loving that believing in love was absolutely pointless Growing with the growth and developing understanding Growing with the growing of a whole new idea of life made me a little less demanding Pleased with being unpleased I had learned then Pleasing others without myself being pleased I could not win Letting go and releasing it all Letting go, I was ever so proud to fall Thinking of not thinking brings me peace Living knowing that I am dead, therefore not living, I feel from my trap I am released Loving that love is only a state of mind I didn't believe in however, I hear it takes time Growing until I grew a dark state yet I am just fine How pleasing to please only yourself In letting go, I had left behind the people for only the good and myself.

I want to get a flat stomach, NOT GAIN 20 MORE POUNDS MOM!

I desperately want a flat stomach. I’d be content with the shape of my body. I just really want one. I’d fit into clothes better and you know what, I wouldn’t be asked when my baby is due if my tummy was flat. Btw, I’m abstinent and going into high school so yeah, dumb question. Not there I care about their opinion like that, it's just aggravating being hassled like that and it looks so bad.Anyways, where I’m going with this, I cant exercise because of the accident so all of my plans of trying to get a flat stomach went out the door before Summer even came. That woman changed a lot of my plans when she hit us. And you know what, it really doesn’t help with my mother stacking this house up with candy and mostly, chocolate. That fricking sucks! Can’t work out, can’t be healthy. I wanted banana chips and I can’t have them because she said 2.88 is too much. Uh, its healthy, tastes good, I want it and since when do we have money for all this candy. I’m miserable, lonely, no one to talk to this Summer, boyfriend is M.I.A., I’m gaining wait instead of losing, and my best friend is the status box on Facebook and the candy in the fridge that I’m getting sick off of because I am allergic to milk and before that I keep having this uncontrollable urge to puke and I feel sick and depressed. Uhg, I HATE SUMMER! It’s hot, boring and depressing. Why did we move to the country? There’s nothing to do!