Who Am I Really?

I have no idea, for once in my life, what I want to say right now. I have no idea what my problem is. Actually, I don’t know if I even have a problem. I don’t know what I want. I don’t know if I’m complaining or wishing half the time. I’m not too sure about anything these days. Or am I? its really sad. And this really sucks. I want to blog my whole heart out but I’m not even sure if I have a heart. Do I care? I must. I have to because I’m acknowledging it. Right? Talk about no subject.
I tend to ramble when I finally get someone to talk to me. I’m do see now that I am a bit of a freakazoid. Everything I say either depresses people or they just don’t get me. No one gets me. There is no one I can talk to because no one understands me. Do I even understand me? Do I like anybody? Or anything for that matter.
Now I wouldn’t say that I hate people. Just some I really dislike. And when I am in a fight with that person who I don’t like I don’t even think or stutter when I tell them so. The guys back then who said that they like me is because I am not afraid to speak my mind. I never knew I did so. I am quiet majority of the time. Its just when something needs to be said I say it right then and there at the right moment. I was that way. I don’t know what happened.
I feel like over time I lost sight of who is jaime. I don’t even know her anymore. I sometimes think she is dead. Long gone from this earth. I don’t know who I am or what I want to be. I guess maybe I am going on some type of journey to understand and find myself and etc… maybe I should just list all the things that I like and don’t like and keep sight of that so I can know myself. Its so sad. I don’t even know myself. But seriously, who am I? what am I? uhg, I hate reality…